Tanzania tales...... An 'ode' to Jackson.

I really don't know where to begin. And I haven't written anything for many, many weeks, so bear with me.
This blog has been neglected for a fair few months now (I apologise, thank you for not abandoning us in our absence). And as I scrolled down the pages I realised nothing has been said since we split our different ways and Abbie, Kate, Gina and I vanished off to Tanzania.
Which is criminal.
Because Tanzania really was all I COULD talk about for many months. And even now a day doesn't go by where I'm not wondering about them back there, daydreaming of the hot dusty villages and the wooden house we lived in; Eagle Lodge.

We went out with good intentions. We went out nervous. Excited. Unaware. 'Gap Years' are so traditional and cliche these days, and yet the experience is anything but. I loved that every day was different. That each morning I could wake up not knowing what would happen, knowing nothing would be the same.
No, I lie.
There were some stable people and events in our day to day life. Let me introduce you to Jackson.

"Jacki-boy"

He was our Translator (no one there spoke English, only Swahili) and Driver. At the beginning, I'm not sure why, perhaps I was intimidated, he passed me by. I saw him as a cheery, distant fellow who like to wear red. But as the days would fly by and we would spend many a time squeezed in the front of the red truck with him, or waiting in the Coptic hospital together, we came to realise he is one of the best human beings on the planet.
He had, for one, an easy sense of humour and found the most bizarre things funny.
He confessed that he and Freddie (the Driver/Translator for the other team) had thought Gina and I, being twins, were actually one person. He told me, with a beaming smile, how they had rung each other up-
Jackson: "She's with me, at the church"
Freddie: "No, no she is here, in Mkyringo!"

That set me laughing for a long time.

He was open and honest; never shy of saying how he felt about the situation in his country, in the villages, or even us. He had an innate urge to help you, always there to lend a hand be it with hammering, or checking if you are okay when you have been ill. This easygoing, genuine innocence and yet so worldly a wisdom earnt him the respect and love of the whole team- many a journey we would be singing; "we love you Jackson, we do, we love you Jackson, we do!"

A child's 'flap happy' hat he adored so much!

He said many times he would love to go to England, asking what it was like to fly in a plane- I didn't have the heart to tell him, or want to tell him, that living the 'western life' would probably kill all the hope in Jackson. Is it wrong I was secretly glad he would never come to England? To protect that in him?

Because Jackson had an innate prompting to protect us. Especially us as girls, he had to defend us from more than one 'suitor' or drunk on the streets of Musoma. And yet it more the emotional harm he feared we would come to, that he seemed most eager to prevent. One of my favourite memories of Jackson, is when Kate and I were upset, taking a man, Kitara, in our village to a physiotherapist. On seeing our miserable faces Jackson left for a few minutes, then came back in. He beckoned to us to come outside. "I have a surprise, just come, just come." We quietly slipped off the table where we were perched and followed him round the back and outside of the treatment room. We squinted in the sun and tried to make out what he was walking towards. Then we both laughed. It was a playground filled with rough swings, a wooden seesaw and a roundabout. Jackson was trying to cheer us up. I'll never forget the air swinging by, the green and blue background all a blur with the slight and sudden hint of red.

A house in our village.

He also had an incredible strength of self. He knew, and wanted us to know, the 'real Africa'. He would try to explain with words, and failing that, we once disappeared into the Tanzanian landscape. We were down at the bottom of our village, the team leaders at the top, and were filled with an urge to go exploring. Jackson seemed only to glad to steal us away- Kate, myself and Andy. We abandoned the path and went sprinting for a long way through the bristling Tanzanian fields, following Jackson as he ran knife in hand. We reached a pile of vast, large rocks- eerily circular- and began to climb our way up to get the full impact of the fading view. Just that brief memory of freedom brings a smile to my face.

The day we went exploring...

So this is Jackson. He is an expert at knowing which trees have snakes in, exactly how to barter with a policeman, how to eat Sugar Cane and how to cheer someone up. He is very protective about the little hair he has, is an incredible teacher in the schools, has a limited taste in card games, and knows TEN national languages as well as English. He likes to wear red, has a chicken called Jasmine, and believes in what he does. That's Jackson.

But I need to stop.
I could go on in detail not just about Jackson but about all manner of things Tanzania related. Maybe I'll do it this way. In anecdote form. Because I could write a NOVEL about the experiences we had in Tanzania and the people we met, the children we played with and the Church we built. Anyway. This is an 'ode' to Jackson, so that no one forgets what an incredible person God put in our path.

The Church Team

The Potter's Hands - Sarah

I think it's time for me to share with you what has been going on for the last three months. My only excuse for this enormous time delay is.... well, business and fulness of life! You will see what I mean in a second :)!

This time last year, I was applying deferred entry to uni. I knew I wanted to go to uni. I also knew I wanted a gap year - I always had done since my brother and sister went here there and everywhere on theirs, bringing back spiritual treasure with them each time. But I wanted to know what God's will for my gap year was. It was a time of doubt for me - am I even meant to be doing this, is this just my selfish human nature, I want to know God's heartbeat especially for this opportunity ... how do I find it? He spoke to me and confirmed my want to do Modern Languages next year. And the sense that I, and others kept coming back to was that God was saying "what do you want to do on your gap year?" It was like He was giving me the liberty and gift of this year. He was asking me to co-partner with Him. This is a really Biblical idea, and if I'm honest, I struggled to accept it. I just wanted God to give a sign out of the sky with an arrow saying GO HERE. But that didn't happen.
           What did happen was that I started to depend on Him more and more. That is one of the most valuable things! It was hard but looking back now, I wouldn't change that experience - I can see all that God was preparing me for. One day, my art teacher randomly suggested that I do an art foundation course. I wasn't totally sure, and if I'm really honest, I wanted to go off on some amazing exotic adventure rather than stay in England and study art.

I decided I'd apply and see if I got in because it is really competitive. When I visited the college, I loved it. I could really see myself fitting in. I had my interview and got a place, and I had this unexplainable ridiculous JOY. Whilst on the campus tour, I had an overwhelming sense of peace that just convicted me that this place was where I needed to be for my gap year. The Spirit of the Lord was moving in my heart.

I was really excited all summer leading up to it. And then 2 weeks before leaving home, a lot of "flaming arrows from the evil one" - I had allowed my "shield of faith" (Ephesians 6:16) to drop for that moment in time. But what this did mean was that I had to consciously choose to trust in God with every small ounce of strength in my body. If I didn't, I couldn't cope.
On the way down in the car with mum, we prayed and declared scripture all the way. We asked for someone nice to meet when I got there. We asked for things to keep my mind off home in the first week. We asked for Godly strength.

This song holds a lot of significance for me. It got me through the tough time of leaving home, leaving my safe childhood stepping out into an adventure with my Lord and Saviour. I didn't want to do it without Him! It is based on Psalm 18, have a listen!

God provided everything - every.single.thing that I needed. There was someone lovely that I met as soon as I got here. The first week was busy and I didn't miss home too much. The art course is amazing. Jesus is teaching me how to release His presence through art. The place is INSANE. I get to live by the sea!!! God just knows my heart so well - everything is so chilled; no one ever wears heels on a night out - I love that! Beautiful inspiration is all around me. He has planted me so well in places that hold no coincidence. I have been able to witness so much to my friends. God has blessed me with a church that just wants to know the Father's heart.

And it's true, there are hard things: - It is not always easy being away from home. And I have had to step out of my comfort zone a lot. But I'm not so fearful of doing that now. God is shaping me in radical ways, in ways that only He can do. I wouldn't change that for anything. And whilst part of me still wishes I got to go travel, I know that deep deep in my heart, I am in the right place for this year. No hardship that I encounter can ever take away from the all-surpassing greatness of knowing Him! I do have a long summer holidays, so am praying about what to do with them :)! Please join me in praying.

So I'll leave you with a word of encouragement and advice for you all -
This experience has made me realise that I just don't want to go anywhere that God is not calling me to be. Sometimes you have to look really hard to find what that may be, but believe me, it is such an important thing. "Keep on seeking, and you will find" Matthew 7:7.

He is shaping me in His potter's hands. And I believe that I really am just a jar of clay made to shine with the Lord's glorious treasure. (2 Corinthians 4:7)
With love,
Sarah xx

Praising God

Sometimes bad things happen. We can’t see them coming, we don’t know why, we can’t explain them and we can’t predict what effect they will have on our lives. But we can trust that good things will come from them no matter how serious things may seem. 

Paul writes to the Church in Rome (Romans 8:28); “For we know that in all things, Christ works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (NIV) And this is what I believe, that despite the bad of life, good will come. The Message version says: “That's why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.”

On Bank Holiday Monday I had a car accident which came totally out of the blue for no apparent reason. I can’t explain what happened or why it happened to me or why it left me with the scars it has done. But some very wise and lovely people have reminded me continually of this verse and that God will work good through each aspect of my circumstances. I don’t know what’s coming next or how long it may take me to recover fully but I know that I can praise God despite uncertainty. 

If you’re struggling with difficult circumstances or something bad has happened to you, remember that if you love Jesus he will bring good through it and from it. We are called to his plan and purpose and this is just one more step on the way.

Keep smiling, forget your worries and enjoy the sun!!

Megs